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Disney Adds Closed Captioning to Theatrical Remake of Dumbo. Sales Plummet

Deaf community shocked at how bad the story actually is.
BURBANK, CA - The Offices at Disney are hushed. For once, the elephant in the room has a name. It's name is Dumbo.  In an effort to attract a wider audience, Disney sent out CC packages to national theatres Friday. "We thought that a good wholesome remake would strike a chord with young vulnerable audiences who just don't fit in. Like deaf kids" Said a marketing strategist who declined to share their name. Yet, the effect has been just the opposite. 

"I thought it was amazing the first time because of the visuals, but now I see that it is just an empty rehashing of the same story without any of the subtext that the original had" signed Ally McJones, a DHH woman. "I wish I could unsee the captions, I liked it so much better before when I had no idea that there were subplot points that made no sense" said a small deaf child. 

The overall feeling in the deaf community is one of both shock and anger. The leader of The Deaf Alliance summed this up, saying "once again, Disney has pulled the wool over our eyes thinking they could pass off a piece of crap as a good film just because we can't fully follow all the plot points and catch the holes in the story" 

"We are learning from this, and have decided the obvious choice is to roll back to our previous strategy of pumping out trash and half-realized hetero-patriarchial-abled-normative fantasies passing it off as something new" said Disney.

The film was released in March, 2019 and has a 46% rating on Rotten Tomatoes.

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